Ah, that distinctive feeling of the second gruelling NaNoWriMo week. When your carefully crafted plan goes awry and you run out of ideas. Or, if you’re me, you didn’t have much of a plan to begin with and everyone’s either on a horseback chase, doing witchcraft or having a fireside chat that would put Parkinson to shame. Still, there’s always last year’s tradition of the NaNoWriMo reward scheme.
Yes. Last year wasn’t good for the bank account. Every 10,000 words, I’d make an ill-advised online purchase. This amounted to a first pressing of Selling England By The Pound and The Lamb Lies Down On Broadway, tickets to see the splendid Ian Anderson of Jethro Tull at Ely Cathedral and a mysterious bottle of bitters for making pisco sours, a drink that causes Pete’s face to gurn in the manner of Les Dawson. (That’s why I now just ask for a ‘Les Dawson’ when we have the ingredients in.)
This year I had need of a new computer, especially one portable enough to take to the pleasant company of the Edinburgh NaNoBeans who hold weekly write-ins. So I accidentally a Surface Pro 2. It’s working out rather well. It runs Scrivener, Spotify and, er, Unreal Tournament Anthology for those all-important writing breaks. And after some consultation, it’s been named Tension. Surface. Tension. Geddit?
I was going to leave it at that and not buy any more NaNoTreats. And then yesterday Fleetwood Mac announced a UK tour with the original lineup. Having banked Peter Gabriel and Kate Bush in ‘legends I have now seen in my lifetime’, I was quite keen to see the Mac. Until the good tickets sold out one minute after going up. And the rest were suddenly priced at three times face value. Dejected, I turned to Tension for solace. Tension has synced apps from my phone, including Fresh Paint, a rather shiny artsy app. Armed with a stylus, and in the absence of magazine scans for this week’s Retro Corner, I decided to make a portrait of Fleetwood Mac to cheer myself up. Here’s a picture I randomly found on Bing:
Now, I haven’t done art since GCSE, but it can’t be that hard, right?
Oh. Er. Well, here we see John McVie with his arm in a sling after a distinctly unimpressed Christine pushed him off the stage for messing up during The Chain. Poor Stevie Nicks is cross that her hair has had 240 volts through it. Due to a schedule clash, Mick Fleetwood has been replaced by Hodor. And as for Lindsey Buckingham, I couldn’t fit him on the end so I had him looming out of the bottom of the canvas like a demented Mafia boss. I think I should quit while I’m ahead. And get someone else to do my book cover.
Now, back to those NaNoWriMo words you lot, or Buckingham will come round and break your, er, guitars.
BREAKING NEWS: My lovely friend Simon pointed out the Mac have cunningly added extra dates, so I leapt upon Ticketmaster in a frothing frenzy and managed to get two tickets only marginally dearer than the Sir Peter of Gabriel ones. I may actually cry. I bet it was that drawing that brought me good luck.